One of the greatest gifts I have given myself is to be mindful of when I am moving out of a state of love. When I am feeling stressed, I usually regress, and then find myself moving quickly out of a loving state. I can feel the movement in my body, then I can hear my thoughts shift and the biggest thing I notice is how I talk to my daughter. My tone begins to change, and I get very harsh and judgmental about her needs.
My needs begin to rise up, and in my mind they are much more important than hers. This is usually when I have not been attending to my own needs and then when she asks me, one to many times, for something WHAMO I am moving out of a state of love. I’ve learned when this happens, that I do have a choice, and even though sometimes I feel taken over by my fear, I can quickly work with myself to return to a state of love. First, I have to hear myself, take a moment and connect with my own pain instead of projecting it onto my daughter. Over time, it gets easier, and yet be gentle with yourself and try to see, when you move away from love, there is always a way back!