How is 2022 going so far? This year, we are going to dive a bit deeper into the Pillars of Purejoy. These are the Purejoy foundations that are unique and distinct to the Purejoy Parenting model. At Purejoy we don’t focus on controlling our child’s behavior instead, we focus on our internal experience while working with the emotional triggers that arise when our children behave in certain ways.
I found when looking outside for advice or methods to control my daughter’s behavior I wasn’t trusting my internal wisdom. Comparing myself with other parents was brutal. It seemed at the time that other parents didn’t struggle as much as I did. I knew I wasn’t interested in consequencing or punishing my daughter when she behaved in ways that triggered me, and yet I was stumped as to what else to do.
Where was my internal wisdom hiding? I assumed it would just show up when I needed it and yet when parenting I had to dive deep to find my true knowing. First, I had to turn towards the behaviors in myself that I was still judging. Making peace within brought peace without.
Slowly, I turned inward instead of outward trusting that if I didn’t control my daughter’s behavior the world wouldn’t end. As I sat, it got clearer and clearer that when my daughter acted out she was trusting herself. She wasn’t trying to please or placate me which I learned to do. She was expressing her internal experience and looking to me for support.
Finally, as I trusted I could stay with the intensity arising in my internal world, I showed up for my daughter in hers. This offered my daughter a safe environment to trust herself instead of looking to me for permission to be who she truly is.
Give yourself time, Open your heart, and expect to see miracles as you welcome your wisdom to the table.