Parenting is a journey filled with intense emotions, both for children and parents. It is important to explore the energetics of these feelings to create a healthy and balanced parent-child relationship.
When a child experiences a strong emotion, such as fear or disappointment, it can feel overwhelming to them. As a parent, it is crucial to understand that these intense feelings are a result of their young regulatory system. For example, not getting a desired treat can feel like a life or death situation to a child. Their fear and frustration may manifest through challenging behaviors like hitting or biting.
In our culture, it is common to view such behaviors as threatening or wrong. However, it is essential to look beyond these perceptions and energetically attune to your children’s emotions. Just like an energy ball or a hot potato, their emotions can trigger similar energetic charges within you. These charges are often influenced by your own childhood experiences and repressed behaviors.
Recognizing your own energetic charges is key to responding effectively to your children. Some behaviors may not trigger any charge within you, allowing you to respond with your adult capacity and support your child’s emotional needs. However, when the energetic charges activate, it can feel just as intense for you as it does for your child. This can lead to reactive behaviors, escalating the situation further.
To break this cycle, you can create a SafeSeat for yourself. In this safe space, you acknowledge your activated state and work with the energetic charge without acting it out. Instead of suppressing or denying these emotions, you offer them kindness and allow them to move through you in a safe and supportive way. By doing so, you cultivate emotional safety for yourself and your children.
Understanding and managing your own energetic charges allows you to show up for your children in a new state of being. You can attune to their emotional needs and respond with empathy and calmness. This shift in your energy can help to calm their nervous systems, ultimately leading to a positive change in their behaviors.
Parenting is not about overpowering your children or demanding compliance. It is about creating a fair and balanced exchange of emotions and values. By linking your highest values with those of your children, you foster an environment of respect and understanding. This fair exchange promotes healthy self-esteem and strengthens the parent-child bond.
As a parent, you have the power to transform your own energetic responses and create a nurturing and supportive environment for your children. By embracing the energetics of feelings and practicing attunement, you can navigate the challenges of parenting with grace and compassion.
Remember, it is through your own self-awareness and willingness to engage in a fair exchange that you can truly meet your children’s emotional needs and foster their growth and development.